have you ever

I got a feeling I already had a post of this title before. so lazy to look back at my post to check.. 'Have you ever' by Brandy. Seriously i don't know who the singer is.. i just loved that song, heard it from the radio when i was young i guess. when i listen to the song i just can feel it.. lol~ one of those sentimental songs that are so attached to my heart.

have you ever love somebody so much it makes you cry?
have you ever needed something so bad you can't sleep at night?
have you ever tried to find the words but they don't come out right?
have you ever...

have you ever?


i wonder.

smile to me, life

He have expectations, dreams, achievements; done or yet to be done or couldn't be done.

" you are so much different from me. you are doing good now. you are better than what i did when i was your age. you did good."

I was just shocked and stunt by what he said, a praise when i am in hoax? then i finally realize what he is going through. my grandparents couldn't be around for him to guide him through this.he goes though half of his life on his own without a parents love. yet he can be so rational in thinking, always guiding us through things that he himself have yet to discover. I know i should have love him more. I know i do, it just somehow lost track, maybe i took it for granted.

All that he wants are just simple things; greetings, joy, a helping hand, a smile.

" how old are you now? 21 years old, at such a young age , you can't smile already?"
" i'm 23, i'm older now."; then i cried. hahahahahaz....

cuz whats in my mind was i am old, so is he.

i will...smile to him, smile to myself, smile to life.

Cheers everyone!!!:)

never too late

i hope its not too late to post about my past. hahahahaz. HAD THE TOTALLY MOST SURPRISING BIRTHDAY EVER!

shocked my heart with the screaming and shouting in my home toilet. being tricked and fooled to my toilet filled with all my besties , love ya all!!! really can't describe the feeling tho.tired la that time. hahahaz.. going through toughest time of life, so frustrated. guess my family just can't stand me being so emo everyday. thus, a party was thrown, just for me. thanks for all the freaking friends who played along to give me this awesome surprise; primary, secondary, uni friends.  ooohhh all the presents too~! love you all from every beat and bits of my heart. keke

hahhaaz posting this on the 1st day of 2013! wth?! not too late la..... new day, new room, new  environment. i can't help it but to start drawing the word 'welcome'' and pasted it on my wall. I hope 2013 will be a life changing year, with you, you, you and you~ basically its everyone la.. good times or bad times, its my time of life, so gonna live it! but most probably i will be procrastinating , as usual.

oh gosh, here comes 2013!

all the best ya everyone!! hwaiting!!!

dropdead

totally fall asleep right after i reach home. landed on the bed to a plane to dreamland. gosh... my brain is so tired. been busy and stressed up at work lately. too many new projects that has deadline due in a week. crazy ppl. lol

had a surprise bday celebration after work, uncle jang korean restaurant~! Dak-galbi, gosh, niceee.... but my cloths stinks after that T.T cuz its like a big hot plate that they fried instantly on our table. vege, meat, potato? apa rice cake and all sort,fried all with korean sause and added with ramen~~~~ i have to say, i loveee the ramen XD after 70 percent of the meal eaten, it was recommended to add fried rice. but urgh. dislike. will stick to ramen next time hahahz

change, what a easy word to be said. of cuz with the will , nothing is impossible. but damn, i am just too stubborn. hahahaz... feel so sorry to fatso. forgive me for being just a brat? but who knows, the greatest motivation to change is to dump or to be dump~ hahahahz but i never want that to be on the list,never.

change, that shall be it.

tomorrow la! hahahaz~~~

awake?

lol.. still awake at this wee hours. its been quite often i stayed up late. many things just happen at the same timeline, kindna hard to cope. but rawrrr~~~ glad things are getting better.

read a post at fb today, saying that Sagittarius will have terrible luck next year, everything is a disaster. aiks!!! i don't know.. it kindna dragged me down, maybe i should stop my plans? new plans here and there... zzz seriously i don't know which one to listen to. hahahaz~~

fatso gave me a youtube link, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uiyFbCByAWQ
commencement address by steve jobs. really inspiring, the conclusion i made, go through the hardship, take bold choices, rawr rawr rawr, one day things will just work out the way it is. lol.. connecting dots... dot dot dot . fingers crossed*

sot adi la at this hour. i think i don't plan to sleep and just go to work and dread myself out like nobody's business. oh... yea... today i think its bad luck day or something. everyone just want to find fault with me. maybe i'm just too tired. rawrrrrr... what am i saying....

what a post...

What a step! XD

Yeap, considering this as a big step in life. more like a stage of life. the day has come, i've graduated!! XD Could say this is really a great, happy, exciting, sienz, tired, painful day LOL

Graduating in kampar new hall is totally great, damn happy my whole family came with my grandparents, just regret din't snap more photos with them. its a total chaos when we came out from the hall, packed with ppl, have to adjust between friends and family, din't really get to snap photos with a lot of friend T^T huhuhu...

oh!!i almost drop my convo hat when i'm on the stage, yeap.. almost. luckily it din't!! the speech was quite boring, i wanted to sleep, but i was afraid to be caught on tape sleeping. hahaha~ awesomely gorgeous flower i got from my family, fatso, penny and gang friend. i get gifts from friends too! <3 a="a" all="all" and="and" are="are" artwork="artwork" awesome="awesome" bird="bird" book="book" card="card" convo.="convo." couldn="couldn" customize="customize" cute="cute" damn="damn" expect="expect" flower="flower" for="for" friends="friends" from="from" gaga="gaga" goddess="goddess" greatest="greatest" hahahaz="hahahaz" handmade="handmade" him="him" it="it" js="js" kamsahamida="kamsahamida" lady="lady" letter="letter" lulu="lulu" make="make" man.="man." mei="mei" my="my" p="p" really="really" rest="rest" s="s" san="san" senior="senior" snoopy.="snoopy." soft="soft" t="t" thank="thank" thanks="thanks" the="the" to="to" totally="totally" touching="touching" toy="toy" was="was" who="who" wishes="wishes" woonhoo="woonhoo" xddd="xddd">
Special thanks to sharon who dropped by. arggh~~ timing la.. damn rush, really so sorry couldn't make it to your convo. but really thanks for coming!!  love ya always! and that penny.. aiyorr.... we both no jodoh? how come we exchanged flowers without even meeting each other!? luckily we manage to catch up before you enter the hall...HAPPY GRADUATE oh!! thanks fatso for everyeverything <3 br="br">

i think i still haven't get enough sleep.. i want to go and sleep somemore.. more  more more... zzz
nah! just joking!!

This graduation shall be a be a big recognition and a boost for us all to be advance in the future.. HWAITING EVERYONE!

hiu i'm back!

i was reminded that i have a blog. hahaha.. its been really a long time since i've updates, i guess the job i'm having now is really dreading me out. the pay is ok, job scope is too much, aldo i did learn more things about purchase and delivery ordes. but argh~ after an outing with friends and talks of the jobs we're having now- i start to doubt my direction.

i want to be a web designer. i don't know how i come into that conclusion but its just like how i choose graphic design. i guess i don't dare to quit my job now and pursue cuz is know i have nothing. nothing to impress.

so till i gather enough time to improve my skills and build my my confidence, maybe one day i shall release that boom. (nah~ fireworks would be better XD)